SATURDAY ALTERNATIVE CARTOONS: OCTOBER 13, 2018

I remember how we could touch the sky with our feet as we felt the poles lifting up! To be honest, that could be the set we had in our back yard. When I was that age we did have such a white picket fence as well.

The artist recommended picking this one up immediately; he is sure it will be removed fairly quickly.

The playbook is prepared to destroy every possible nominee for anything Trump puts forth.

My type of parent.

Headline should read: You're Done, Canada. This Rhodes Scholar does not have the best interests of old stock Canadians in mind. As you can see below, she, too, is a Soros employee, just like Justine.

Did not see one Canadian animal in this line-up of ugly little Commie oriented toys.

My sentiment is, you made your bed; lie in it. You left this nation in a state of hatred now BEG for the precious freedom you so carelessly tossed away.

For every gender!

All but one is white. Who will be left to hold up the signs? Gotta question the viability of the two suicidal farts on the right.

The effects of modern Communism: cultural Marxism.

I had to post this silly thing. Nazis Nazis everywhere!

They are hating on nationalism.

I have never liked this war-mongering slave of Israel, Nikki Haley. But obviously Israel did. EVERY cartoonist is bemoaning her stepping down, but she said, as she announced this, she had NO intention of running for the presidency in the future and that she had told the President right from the start that she only planned to hold the post for two years, as she has.

The origin of a (((stereotype))).

Artist Rant:  
Church ‘Ladies Day’: Now Needed More Than Ever
 

As I type these words, my wife is eagerly anticipating the annual Ladies Day at the country church we’ve been members of for the entirety of our marriage (and which I’ve attended since I was six days old).

I know the word “ladies” sticks in the craw of some segments of the unchurched (as well as the ultra-progressive churched). They see it as a lingering, condescending vestige of oppressive patriarchy. They imagine a Ladies Day lecture sprinkled with scriptural references such as “The Mansplaining on the Mount” (their terminology) and the chauvinistic effrontery of someone holding the Pearly Gates open for them.

They divide all church women into either cowering doormats or abrasive, self-righteous biddies like Dana Carvey’s Church Lady on “Saturday Night Live.”

While most nonreligious motorists can pass a Ladies Day marquee without a knee-jerk reaction, some sigh with a mixture of pity and contempt. They have a preconceived notion of the attendees and can just picture the women (even octogenarian Mrs. McGillicuddy) fighting over door prizes. (“Yee-ha! Nail clippers and Chinese herbs! I get to stay barefoot and pregnant! Eat your heart out, Betty White!”)

But in a world of selfishness and vulgarity, I rejoice that we are still blessed with women who have some measure of self-control, decency and modesty. I am proud my wife is part of a broad cross-section of women (stay-at-home moms, career women, retirees and spiritually minded teens) who share a reverent goal while retaining their own hobbies, personalities and dreams. These women can enjoy some good, clean fun and serve as pillars of strength for their families and their communities.

It’s ideal when talk and ACTION can be combined, as when Ladies Day is paired with a food drive or clothing collection. The ladies can take care of the less fortunate ~ defined as people without enough school supplies, people without their necessary medications, people without 13,000 grandbaby pictures to share… 

The hosting congregation and their visitors can bolster one another’s faith ~ faith that wayward adult children will see the light, faith that doctors will be guided in performing delicate operations, faith that when Jesus is preparing “many mansions” for us, he isn’t tracking mud into the foyer… 

Certainly, ladies can reach even greater heights with an appropriate overarching theme to tie the activities together. Such themes include “Showers of Blessings,” “Balancing Your Act” and “The Potter and the Clay.” Less successful themes have included “Jesus, Take The Wheel ~ and Hold My Purse While You’re At It” and “When Life Gives You Lemons, Make Lemonade ~ but not that awful stuff Judy Beedlebaum brings to all the church socials!”

Women come away from the meetings with memories they will cherish for a lifetime, but it helps to leave with calendars, refrigerator magnets and other doodads to bring verses to life. Of course, different churches have different budgets. Not every fellowship hall rings with shouts of “You get an ark and you get an ark and you get an ark!”

Not many macho men would want to participate in the entire two or more hours of Ladies Day, but I suspect a few of the curious would love to be the proverbial “fly on the wall.” That is, until they’re overcome by fumes from scented candles and pumpkin spice tea. (“If I could just reach that spider web… and sweet, merciful death…“)

–

Copyright 2018 Danny Tyree. Danny welcomes email responses at tyreetyrades@aol.com and visits to his Facebook fan page “Tyree’s Tyrades.”

Why do her feet look backwards?

What? No boys?

The streets of my town have been torn up and redesigned for cyclists creating a nightmare for drivers, to put it mildly. There are not enough cyclists to warrant the number of roads and new lanes they have converted. Three lane roads are reduced to a narrow 2 for cars and 1 1/3 of the width turned into cycling lanes. 

Looks like someone needs a little media attention!

I used to do all these things when I began collecting records. How time changes but nothing beats the sound of these old systems for warmth and depth.

And of course, Holder's armed New Black Panther pals will handle the polling places. 

Enraged by the fact that Donald Trump is, in fact, "winning" on the national and international stages, and doing more for America's minority communities than Obama accomplished in 8 years, top Democrats have been hard pressed to come up with a rebuttal to this administration's remarkable success. But at last, they've found something: increasing calls for physical violence against anyone who opposes their racist, sexist, and socialist policies.

And the calls for violence aren't just coming from the meth-using, basement-dwelling, Antifa minions who get a weekly allowance from George Soros (and, probably, their long-suffering parents). No, the blood lusting battle cries are coming from top Democrats.

Eric Holder, the sleazy law-breaking bag man for Barack Obama who helped destroy the credibility of the Department of Justice, just issued a statement in which he declared that "Michelle Obama says when (Republicans) go low, we go high. No! NO! When they go low we KICK them!"

Hillary Clinton, who once swore to accept the results of the election in which Donald Trump kicked her fanny, just declared "You cannot be civil with a political party that wants to destroy what you stand for, what you care about. That's why I believe if we are fortunate enough to win back the House and or the Senate, that's when civility can start again. But until then the only thing Republicans seem to recognize and respect is strength."

Hang on ~ we're pretty sure that there's a word that distills that whole thought. "Strength" applied in a way that lacks "civility"...  Oh yeah, now we remember! That word is violence.

And let's not forget Mad Maxine Waters, who helped pour gasoline on this anti-American fire by saying "If you see anyone from the Cabinet in a restaurant, a department store, at a gasoline station, you get out and create a crowd! And you push back on them! And you tell them they're not welcome anymore, anywhere!" Except, perhaps, the death camps that Maxine and her chums seemingly have in mind for citizens who won't do what they're told.

This is in no way amusing, because it's pushing our nation to a very dangerous place. Not that you'd know it from the mainstream media, which has now undertaken a concerted and coordinated effort to say that violent Leftist mobs aren't really "mobs" at all ~ they're just groups of concerned citizens who are expressing their first amendment rights by kicking people in their faces, beating cars with truncheons, harassing family homes, and ~ when things get a bit boring ~ setting things on fire.

It seems inevitable that blood will eventually be shed ~ and that's just what Holder, Hillary, Maxine, and the rest of their ilk want. In victimhood there is power ~ so why not push impressionable kids into acts so dangerous that a few may get shot while assaulting right wing Nazis?

That scenario is quite literally the Leftists' wet dream. And they're bothered not at all by whose blood will be providing the moisture. 

Truthfully, we've still got a bit of burnout from the ups and downs of the Kavanaugh confirmation debacle, though we were pleased to see today that Supreme Court Justice Kavanaugh is on the bench and on the job, hearing arguments and raising questions. This is as it should be.

 

There's plenty of ongoing drama and rampant stupidity related to this that we could talk about (like the pierced, pink-haired, and suddenly jobless school teacher who thought it was a smart idea to tweet "Kill Kavanaugh") but we'd prefer to treat this as a time of relative silence and healing. There's only so much of this stuff we can expose ourselves to until something bursts in our noggin.

And that's not just hyperbole! A team of Italian researchers has been examining the remains of Romans who were killed when Mt. Vesuvius erupted in 79 AD, and discovered that the sudden exposure to super-heated air actually caused brains to boil with such ferocity that skulls started exploding like small bombs.

We're not absolutely sure that the hot air produced by the Leftists and their media cohorts reaches quite those searing temperatures, but we're not in the mood to put our little grey cells at risk today.

But as long as we're all here anyway, how about an eye-pleasing farewell to the Kavanaugh saga...?

We shall see what we shall see. Meanwhile, how cruel are Ye's former friends and associates? Personally, I have no skin in this game, never having even heard this guy "sing" but I do recognize in him a force that cannot be ignored one way or the other. Interesting how media simply praised the visitors to the Obama ministration, many of whom were quite questionable.